This evening after dinner, we put away our placemats in the large kitchen sideboard and I inadvertently opened the wrong drawer.
It is a drawer I don't often visit. It holds my spoon dish, electric mixer, and this round plastic double-sided zippered thingy that I use to roll out pie dough. Oh yeah, and the extra string used to tie together cuts of meat, turkey legs, and what not.
Tonight, I found a little something extra tucked inside:
Boys Size 8 Wolverine Undies with Red Elastic Waistband...complete with a thick, crusty smear of poo.
It had obviously been there for awhile. I said, "Alex, what is this?" He looked appropriately embarassed and fairly worried that he was going to get in big trouble.
It was one of those hard to yell at your kid moments, because when Dave and I saw what it was we burst out laughing. Alex joined in the revelry immediately, hoping to avoid a time-out (or worse TV banishment).
I mildly chastised him and reminded him that it's really not a good idea to hide stuff like that.
Yes Darling, I did remove and wash all the kitchen items...either by dishwasher or by hand as appropriate. And again, yes I also scrubbed out the inside of the drawer. The undies are in the outside garbage can. It's because I care.
Considering the purchase of a Haz-Mat Suit,
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First off, a thousand and a half pardons for extending my sabbatical for an extra month and a half! I see from my stats that many of you have been faithfully checking in and most probably wondering, "Where the heck-fire did that girl go?"
Well the answer is I got sick....I mean REALLY, RIDICIOUSLY sick. We're talking eight weeks in bed on my bum with such a bad fever and sweats that it completely zapped me. My wonder husband Dave took over all the house/childcare duties in addition to holding down a full time job.
All I'd really wanted was a little break, a little rest....I'm filing this one under "Be Careful What You Wish For You Just May Get It."
Saw at least four different medical specialist all of whom could diagnose me no further than, "Oh, you have a fever of unknown origin." Oh geez-louise that's helpful isn't it? Personally I think it's Latin for, "We have no bloody idea what's wrong with you."
I asked the doctors how often they encountered this "fever of unknown origin" they shook their heads vigoriously and replied, "Oh it's RARE...extremely rare."
So I guess it's nice to be that special....
Meanwhile my five year old son Alex is getting pretty rip snorting upset that Mommy's been sick and unavilable for such a long time. At one point he was telling me he "hated me"...which I knew wasn't true and that he was just upset about me being sick. I finally got out of him that he thought I was "being sick ON PURPOSE." Yowza. Well, we had a mommy-son chat and cleared that up.
Fast forward a few weeks later and Alex gets sick! OH-NO! (He just had a virus and is right as rain after four days). But, the first night he was sick he told me how there were pincher bugs inside his skeleton and they couldn't/wouldn't come out and they just kept biting him and biting him and biting him until he was dead. WHAT THE!?!?!? I mean I know he's got a terrific imagination, but what was that about?
Two thirty that same morning, he wakes up and I'm trying to get him back down. We're chatting a little and suddenly it hits me like a ton of bricks and I say, "Alex do you think there are little pincher bugs in your body because you're sick...and you've heard people say that "someone's got a little bug" when they're sick?"
He said, "Yeah."
So I explained that was just a figure of speech and that bugs didn't really get inside you when you were ill, it was the germs that made you sick, then you went to the doctor and got all better.
But what about the "and they bite me and bite me until I'm dead" part methinks? So I probe a bit further.
"Alex do you think because mommy's been sick for so long that I'm going to die?"
And he said, "Yes."
OH MY GOSH! How scary for him! So of course I reassured him that I wasn't anywhere close to dying and that everything was going to be OK.
How's that for a story? Yowza Pete!
I've missed you all so much...thank you for all the comments you've sent during my absence. And expect that I'll be posting one to two times each week going forward! And P.S. I've been seeing an acupuncturist for two weeks now and it's really helping...going for that "whole body" approach to medicine. More on that later kids...
Cyberhugs to you all,
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My adorable son Alex...age 4 1/2 has been wanting some special "Mommy time." So today we decided to have a "stay at home day." Me and my boy just hanging out.
I know Wii Star Wars will be heavily involved...we've only been up an hour and it's already on. (This kid already knows all the moves and "secrets" of playing this game...it's astounding to me.) The weather is hotter than blazes here (it's been in the 90s) so my genius plan is to involve air conditioning as much as possible in our plans.
I see about 300 games of "Dora's Candyland," with a few million hands of "Go Fish," rounded out with a little "Sponge Bob Connect Four." Thank goodness for board games. (Actually my favorite from childhood is "Sorry" and Alex likes it too...played with slightly modified rules of course.)
Or perhaps "Monsters vs. Aliens" at the cinema? Or indoor jumpy houses? Or both? Only time will tell.
Off to play -
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Week off in the midst of school?
Not a Mom I'm sure.
Schedules disrupted,
Playdates to be planned each day
What to do with kids?
Zoo? Aquarium?
Perhaps a ceramics class?
Someone help me plan.
He and I, we'll play
Legos, Star Wars, Candy Land
A hundred times each.
Lots of new laughter
And memories to be made
Spring break can be fun.
Looking forward to spending the week with my boy -
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This short story was dictated by my son Alex to his teacher Miss Christie. Alex is 4 1/2 and this Mommy is soooooo PROUD! The story has all the necessary elements: beginning, middle, end and a conflict/resolution. I'm marveling at what he knows without needing to learn it!
There were three friends: Flash the Firetruck, Cupcake the Towtruck and Huhzah the Little Blue Car. One day they went sky diving. They drove to the airport and got on an airplane. Huhzah was afraid. Cupcake and Flash were not afraid. They told Huhzah he will get really high and then float down and land on a trampoline so he can'tget hurt. Huhzah felt better and got on the plane.
The plane took off and flew over Alex's Grandpas' house where his Nana lives. Nana waved out the window when the airplane flew over. The plane flew to the mountains. When the plane was above the moutains the three cars put on the parachutes and jumped out of the plane. When they jumped out the parachutes opened and they floated down. Huhzah got tangled up and landed in a tree. Cupcake and Flash landed on the trampoline. They could not find Huhzah!
Cupcak and Flash drove up the mountain to find Huhzah. They looked and looked but they had to keep driving up the mountain. When they were almost to the top they heard Huhzah say, "Hellooooooooooo! I'm up in a tree." Flash used his ladder to get Huhzah down.
They drove down the moutain and back to the garage where they all took a rest.
THE END
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